I'M OK NO I'M NOT (Deluxe Edition)

by Abby Holliday

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1.
IDK WHAT I WANT 03:37
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You looked over How are you so looked over? So I slid on over Put my head on your shoulder I was hoping that you would notice me forever Til it happened and now I finally know better It took seven tries, it happens all the time I start to wonder why I wonder why It was a simple mistake I thought of it for days I always get this way I am this way Put you first I’ve learned to wait in line I promise I don’t mind “Are you sure?” you ask twice Never take the opportunity Keep it quiet, keep it real low Tell myself I’m fond of it When I don’t like the thought of it (Take a deep breath) What if I’m wrong? What if I’m not? Think I know that you’re better off gone Maybe it’s time for me to go home But I don’t know what I want You said goodbye about 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6 times It doesn’t feel right They always let me out alive They always let me out alive What if I’m wrong? Ooo, oooo What if I’m not? Don’t even think about it What if I’m wrong? Ooo, oooo What if I’m not? Oh, I don’t know what I want I don’t know what I want Don’t even think about it Don’t even think about it I don’t know what I want I don’t know what I want Don’t even think about it I don’t know what I want Don’t even think about it What if I’m not? I don’t know what I want What if I’m wrong? What if I'm not? I don’t know what I want What if I'm wrong? What if I'm not? I don’t know what I want What if I'm not? I don’t know what I want Maybe I never did I just keep trying it Hoping it’ll stick
2.
Predictable Life 03:32
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24 years old Don't know how to be alone I've lost all control Forgotten how to handle myself So I get back in the game Like I never ever sat the bench all those days And I fall in love to fill a void I make a list I check it twice I find a boy who looks really nice It doesn't work He's not my type Another day in the predictable life Runnin' in circles Call me temperamental Wonder what you think If I'm too sentimental I don't like the girl in the mirror I've been avoiding her for some years So I take a trip to kill the noise I pack my bags I run away To a place where nobody knows my name It doesn't work I can't disguise Another day in the predictable life Every day is the same And nothing's gonna change Nothing's gonna change anyway Every day is the same And nothing's gonna come my way, my way Every day is the same Oh and nothing's gonna change Nothing's gonna change anyway Every day is the same And nothing's gonna change if I don't act my age All alone Friday night I wanna love me, myself, and I I hope it works I'm not my type Another day in the predictable life Every day is the same And nothing's gonna change Nothing's gonna change anyway Every day is the same And nothing's gonna come my way, my way Every day is the same Oh and nothing's gonna change Nothing's gonna change anyway Every day is the same And nothing's gonna change if I don't act my age
3.
Better By Now 03:29
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The same time for the third day this week Maybe this will be the one where my feelings change Your hand in mine in the passenger seat Convincing you that it’ll stay the same But it won’t stay the same ‘Cause I don’t feel it I was hoping you could help me Get where you are, fix where I’m not But it’s not like that I don’t wanna fight the feeling Should this be easy? Do I even love you? I think I love you But I should love you better by now I should love you better by now I should’ve figured it all out I don’t need you as much as I need to And I don’t miss you enough when you’re not around If I don’t love you better by now, I don’t think I’ll ever know how They say, “When you know you know” Well maybe I don’t know myself I’ll admit that I’m afraid I wouldn’t even cry If I saw you driving around with somebody else It’s so selfish That I don't want the consequence But how come when I tell you I love you I say it under my breath Like there’s a secret that I’m keeping from myself Do I even love you? I think I love you But I should love you better by now I should love you better by now I should’ve figured it all out I don’t need you as much as I need to And I don’t miss you enough when you’re not around If I don’t love you better by now, I don’t think I’ll ever know how I don’t think I’ll ever know how If I don’t love you better by now I don’t think I’ll ever know how It won’t stand the test of time I know it, I know it, I know it You say, “Give it one more try” But what’s the point if I know it, I know it? It won’t stand the test of time I know it, I know it, I know it You say, “Give it one more try” You don’t know how hard I’ve been trying Do I even love you? I think I loved you But I should love you better by now I should love you better by now I should’ve figured it all out I don’t need you as much as I need to And I don’t miss you enough when you’re not around If I don’t love you better by now (Why can’t I love you better by now?) I don’t think I’ll ever know how (I wish I loved you better by now) If I don’t love you better by now (Why can’t I love you better by now?) I don’t think I’ll ever know how (I wish I loved you better by now) You should drop me off at my house If I don’t love you better by now
4.
Eggshells 03:15
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Not enough, I’m coming up short again At least I think so Running outta room when you need a friend But how do I know? Pick me up, lay me down right underneath Wherever you are Go ahead and tread all over me I get used to the mark It leaves a bitter aftertaste But I’d rather die than say it to your face I’m walking on eggshells Thin ice With you All the fuckin’ time And I haven’t got much left inside I try to see both sides It works too well I forget I’m 25 You make me feel like a kid inside Who’s too weak to put up a fight Try a little harder week by week I’m making progress Or maybe I’m just letting you do what you need To ease your conscience Unlock your opinions, let your monsters out Rage on me I guess I’m gonna die before I say it to your face I’m walking on eggshells Thin ice With you All the fuckin’ time And I haven’t got much left inside I try to see both sides It works too well I forget I’m 25 You make me feel like a kid inside Don’t wanna have to be 3 glasses deep to get a word out of me I promise I didn’t, I didn’t mean to be 3 glasses deep, giving you the worst of me I wanna be different, but I’m still walking on Eggshells Thin ice With you All the fuckin’ time And I haven’t got much left inside I try to see both sides It works too well I forget I’m 25 Cause I still feel like a kid inside I’m 25 And I still feel like a kid inside Who’s too weak to put up a fight
5.
Noise 03:53
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6.
Ohio Laundry Room 03:21
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Weekly candy drop-offs All hopped up for our mom You're leaving out the back door Drop the dogs food on the floor Help me with my homework Just in time for summer Every day at the pool You said we might as well live here If I were you I would have said The same thing If I were you I would have said The same thing Ooo, ooo, ooo, oooo Secrets kept in high school Vodka water bottle You're sleeping on the couch now I'm just too young to notice Make excuses for you Think of all the bad news I will never blame you You were dealt a hell of a hand If I were you I would have done The same thing If I were you I would have done The same thing Ooo, ooo, ooo, oooo Ooo, ooo, ooo, oooo Predestined genetics It's not fair, you said it Weekly doc appointments Becoming an annoyance You want to go live your life And you've made up your mind Nothing's going to stop you Even if it takes you If I were you I would have done The same thing If I were you I would have done The same thing Ooo, ooo, ooo, oooo The same thing Ooo, ooo, ooo, oooo The same thing I keep waiting for you To walk right on through That Ohio laundry room And tell me you love me more It would be wonderful
7.
i'm ok 02:12
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Thousands of people downtown A man to my left who shouldn’t be left alone Two in front They’re all they know Towers are singing louder s’nitsuj on stage I swore that he called my name It’s sinking in, creeping in It’s sinking in, creeping in Balloons in the sky He’s to my right Right on time Right on time I don’t expect you to understand it I don’t expect you to understand it I don’t expect you to comprehend this I don’t expect you to comprehend this All I Think about Is how I can’t call you All I think about is how I can’t call you All I think about is how I can’t call you I just think about how I can’t call you To tell you all this But even if I could I don’t expect you to understand it I don’t expect you to comprehend it Just know that I’m okay I’m okay I’m okay
8.
Better By Now - Acoustic (feat. Jansen) 03:56
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The same time for the third day this week Maybe this will be the one where my feelings change Your hand in mine in the passenger seat Convincing you that it’ll stay the same, but, it won’t stay the same ‘Cause I don’t feel it I was hoping you could help me Get where you are, fix where I’m not But it’s not like that I don’t wanna fight the feeling Should this be easy? Do I even love you? I think I love you, but I should love you better by now I should love you better by now, I should’ve figured it all out I don’t need you as much as I need to, and I don’t miss you enough when you’re not around If I don’t love you better by now, I don’t think I’ll ever know how They say, “When you know you know” Well maybe I don’t know myself I’ll admit that I’m afraid I wouldn’t even cry If I saw you driving around with somebody else It’s so selfish That I don't want the consequence But how come when I tell you I love you I say it under my breath Like there’s a secret that I’m keeping from myself Do I even love you? I think I love you, but I should love you better by now I should love you better by now, I should’ve figured it all out I don’t need you as much as I need to, and I don’t miss you enough when you’re not around If I don’t love you better by now, I don’t think I’ll ever know how I don’t think I’ll ever know how If I don’t love you better by now I don’t think I’ll ever know how It won’t stand the test of time I know it, I know it, I know it You say, “Give it one more try” But what’s the point if I know it, I know it? It won’t stand the test of time I know it, I know it, I know it You say, “Give it one more try” You don’t know how hard I’ve been trying Do I even love you? I think I love you, but I should love you better by now I should love you better by now, I should’ve figured it all out I don’t need you as much as I need to, and I don’t miss you enough when you’re not around If I don’t love you better by now (Why can’t I love you better by now?) I don’t think I’ll ever know how (I wish I loved you better by now) If I don’t love you better by now (Why can’t I love you better by now?) I don’t think I’ll ever know how (I wish I loved you better by now) You should drop me off at my house, if I don’t love you better by now
9.
idk what i want (feat. Sawyer) 04:10
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You looked over How are you so looked over? So I slid on over Put my head on your shoulder I was hoping that you would notice me forever Til it happened and now I finally know better It took seven tries, it happens all the time I start to wonder why I wonder why It was a simple mistake I thought of it for days I always get this way I am this way Put you first I've learned to wait in line I promise I don't mind "Are you sure?" you ask twice Never take the opportunity Keep it quiet, keep it real low Tell myself I'm fond of it When I don't like the thought of it What if I'm wrong? Ooo, oooo What if I'm not? Think I know that you're better off gone Maybe it's time for me to go home But I don't know what I want You said goodbye about one two three four five six times It doesn't feel right They always let me out alive They always let me out alive What if I'm wrong? Ooo, oooo What if I'm not? Don't even think about it What if I'm wrong? (what if I'm wrong?) Ooo, oooo What if I'm not? Oh, I don't know what I want I don't know what I want Oh, don't even think about it Don't even think about it I don't know what I want I don't know What if I'm wrong? What if I'm not? I don't know what I want Ooo, don't even think about it I don't know what I want I don't know what I want Don't even think about it I don't know what I want What if I'm wrong? What if I'm not? I don't know what I want Ooo, don't even think about it I don't know what I want
10.
Ohio Laundry Room (Sister Version) 03:47
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Weekly candy drop-offs All hopped up for our mom You're leaving out the back door Drop the dogs food on the floor Help me with my homework Just in time for summer Every day at the pool You said we might as well live here If I were you I would have said The same thing If I were you I would have said The same thing Ooo, ooo, ooo, oooo Secrets kept in high school Vodka water bottle You're sleeping on the couch now I'm just too young to notice Make excuses for you Think of all the bad news I will never blame you You were dealt a hell of a hand If I were you I would have done The same thing If I were you I would have done The same thing The same thing The same thing Predestined genetics It's not fair, you said it Weekly doc appointments Becoming an annoyance You want to go live your life And you've made up your mind Nothing's going to stop you Even if it takes you If I were you I would have done The same thing If I were you I would have done The same thing Ooo, ooo, ooo, oooo The same thing Ooo, ooo, ooo, oooo The same thing I keep waiting for you To walk right on through That Ohio laundry room And tell me you love me more It would be wonderful
11.
Predictable Life (Stripped Version) 04:27
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24 years old Don't know how to be alone I've lost all control Forgotten how to handle myself So I get back in the game Like I never ever sat the bench all those days And I fall in love to fill a void I make a list I check it twice I find a boy who looks really nice It doesn't work He's not my type Another day in the predictable life Runnin' in circles Call me temperamental Wonder what you think If I'm too sentimental I don't like the girl in the mirror I've been avoiding her for some years So I take a trip to kill the noise I pack my bags I run away To a place where nobody knows my name It doesn't work I can't disguise Another day in the predictable life Every day is the same And nothing's gonna change Nothing's gonna change anyway Every day is the same And nothing's gonna come my way, my way Every day is the same Oh and nothing's gonna change Nothing's gonna change anyway Every day is the same And nothing's gonna change if I don't act my age All alone Friday night I wanna love me, myself, and I I hope it works I'm not my type Another day in the predictable life Every day is the same And nothing's gonna change Nothing's gonna change anyway Every day is the same And nothing's gonna come my way, my way Every day is the same Oh and nothing's gonna change Nothing's gonna change anyway Every day is the same And nothing's gonna change if I don't act my age

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released October 9, 2023

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Abby Holliday Nashville, Tennessee

Holliday masterfully guides listeners through moments in time extremely specific to her own life that puts words to collective experiences of the human condition, reaching into places we might not have known existed prior.

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